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ShazJustShaz
New Member
United Kingdom
96 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 01:04:32
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Wot wud u do????????????
if U met sum1 really special dat loves u very much (more den u love dem)and wants to marry U!!
(but da thing is this person is from a completely different cultural & religious background to urself!!!!!)
He/She will do anything for U!!!!!!! they'll even convert to ur religion/culture if it means he/she can be wid U!!!!
* does it bother U dat they hav a different background to u??
* wud u marry them??
* Wud u ask them to convert??
wot wud u do??? and why??? |
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admin
Forum Admin
United Kingdom
1541 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 01:05:27
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so whats his name shaz?!
"98% of the time i'm right, why worry about the other 3?" |
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Darcy
New Member
United Kingdom
70 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 01:13:57
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Well shaz it does'nt matter what race he/she is and not there back ground as long as u both truely love each other and have respect for each other it should work out fine colour/race/religoin should'nt come in to always look whats inside the person not whats on the ourside :)
+KaT+ |
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admin
Forum Admin
United Kingdom
1541 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 01:16:01
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thats true darcy, i agree with u there!
"98% of the time i'm right, why worry about the other 3%?" |
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admin
Forum Admin
United Kingdom
1541 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 11:01:26
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Remember this is in the case that you loved them with all ur heart - not someone u just met.
* does it bother U dat they hav a different background to u?? NO
* wud u marry them?? YES
* Wud u ask them to convert?? Would ask, but would not expect them to!
"98% of the time i'm right, why worry about the other 3%?" |
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Serene
New Member
United Kingdom
62 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 12:08:20
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I happen to be in that precise situation.
My boyfriend is white and came from a Christian background but then he became pagan. But he's not even sure whether to follow that.
Regardless of my religion and culture he still fell in love with me and I him, it didn't matter who we were or where we came from. He said if it meant being with me he wouldn't mind converting to my religion.
I believe that if someone wants to convert they have to do it for their faith not for the one they love. But it's so sweet if they did.
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. |
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admin
Forum Admin
United Kingdom
1541 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 12:49:30
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quote:
I believe that if someone wants to convert they have to do it for their faith not for the one they love. But it's so sweet if they did.
Excellent point!
"98% of the time i'm right, why worry about the other 3%?"
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Rani
Moderator
United Kingdom
757 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 13:48:20
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well shaz do u love him like he loves u? would u do anything for him? do u care for him like he cares for u? can u not live without him? if yes thennnn i guess u should marry him. do u think ul be happy with him?
ThE BeAuTy Of LiFe DoEs NoT DePeNd On HoW hApPy U r, BuT oN hOw HaPpY OtHeRs CaN b BeCaUsE oF YoU |
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admin
Forum Admin
United Kingdom
1541 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 15:29:46
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Shaz is this true?! And u havent even told me about it yet!
"98% of the time i'm right, why worry about the other 3%?" |
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SKY
Average Member
USA
738 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 16:24:44
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ShazJustShaz, If I loved them a lot, I would go for it. Culture and religion shouldn't matter in a marriage, if the couple gets along well and respect each other. If she is going to convert her religion to be with me, then there is nothing in my path that's stopping me from taking the step. So yeah, go for it.
dp |
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Darcy
New Member
United Kingdom
70 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 18:02:03
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As in the sense of the word "go for it" it's not as easy as it sounds 1.. Yes u love this person 2..U'll do anythink to make it work chnage etc..
but changeing to somethink completely diffrent it's going to be hard as u both aint from the same culture .. u both have diffrent needs etc.. u have to sit together and talk about what you both want from life .. do u follow each others paths etc..
i'm saying this from experance and belive me shaz its harder then you think ...
just be sure and make sure u both talk about it ..
+KaT+ |
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SKY
Average Member
USA
738 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 18:33:49
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Sure, but that was just me =) I would definitely go for it, and work out problems as they come up. Sometimes, if you don't grab the opportunity as it comes up, you'll lose your chance.
dp |
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MoMo
Moderator
United Kingdom
288 Posts
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Posted - 29 Mar 2004 : 19:34:37
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| I agree wid Darcy...gotta b practical n rational bought dese tings...itz a guna b a BIG STEP 4 both u if u do go 4 it....jst talk bout it n make sure ur crazy bout him as mch as he's crazy bout u!!! |
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ShazJustShaz
New Member
United Kingdom
96 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 21:13:13
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quote:
I believe that if someone wants to convert they have to do it for their faith not for the one they love.
Serene i totally agree wid u there!!!! you shouldn't convert for da wrong reasons!!! wots da point in converting to a religion that u don't really believe in or intend to follow??
Convert for Faith not for Love!
quote:
As in the sense of the word "go for it" it's not as easy as it sounds 1.. Yes u love this person 2..U'll do anythink to make it work chnage etc..
but changeing to somethink completely diffrent it's going to be hard as u both aint from the same culture .. u both have diffrent needs etc..
Darcy ur rite its not as easy as it may sound! there are a lota different aspects that need to be taken in to consideration.......
U hav different religious/cultural backgrounds that means both ur upbringin, ur beliefs, ur values, ur life style...etc etc.... is different! and then there's the friends/families the other important ppl in both ur lives dat may influence ur decision!
* so wot religion do u believe in if any?
* how wud ur religion/culture affect u if u were in dis situation?
* how wud ur family react if u were in this situation?
Wot wud u do????
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MoMo
Moderator
United Kingdom
288 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 21:21:40
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| IM muslim...my religion n culture r 2 very major aspects in my lyf...n wud b one of da main reasons i wud try not 2 put myslef in dese situations..i mean i no it happens n dat wen peep least expect it or want it 2...bt u hav 2 b wise n do da ryt ting...my rents wud completely go mad!!!... i tink dey wud disown me or sutin.....a lot of asian families r stuuborn in der ways n lyk der culture 2 mch 2 let netin alter it at all... |
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Darcy
New Member
United Kingdom
70 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 21:34:02
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Shaz ,
myself has been in that situation ,as i'm british white and my ex bf was muslim .we had a good strong relationship and both valued our cultures .. but in the end our parents over powerd us and advised us to spilt as we had no future . so they sent him back home to marry etc..
+KaT+ |
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MoMo
Moderator
United Kingdom
288 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 21:37:57
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| Awwwww das a sad story:(....must've bin gutted.....i cant imagine goin thru tht... |
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Darcy
New Member
United Kingdom
70 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 21:40:17
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quote:
Originally posted by MoMo
i cant imagine goin thru tht...
i would'nt wish upon anyone momo :)
+KaT+
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MoMo
Moderator
United Kingdom
288 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 21:48:53
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| Yh man.......das tuff....i hope i never have 2 go thru sutin lyk dat...feel sorry 4 u, goin thru dat.....how u get over it? |
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Darcy
New Member
United Kingdom
70 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 21:52:01
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well it was over 2years ago now momo.... but the worst part is he now lives over the road from me with his wife :SSS
i'm not in love with him anymore .. but as my 1st love he will always have a soft spot in my heart :)
ima strong girl :PPPP ehem Lady!
+KaT+ |
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MoMo
Moderator
United Kingdom
288 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 21:55:10
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| awwwww....well..dis sorta ting can only make u stronger...sound lyk it worked out okay 4 u...bt learn from Dacry's experience.....try 2 avoid dese kinda situations..i no i will!! |
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BengaLTiger
Moderator
United Kingdom
617 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 22:01:17
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Met my current gf 3 years ago. Fell in love instantly, wanted her to be mine. I even prayed to Almighty, wishing i could have someone like her. Then what did Allah (swt) do, he dropped her on my lap. And itís never been the same since. She's Indian of Punjabi decent. First we became best friends. She was interested in my religion and culture from day one. She was curious, and loved me talking Islam and other things. I love her to bits and now that she has knowledge of Islam, she amazes me at times even teaching me a thing or two about Islam. I'm so proud of her, and even though Iíve hurt her so many times in the past for reasons to long to explain. She still puts up with me. The more we argue the more our love grows stronger. She's occasionally drops the hint of marriage. But i feel uncomfortable getting married. Itís just not the right time for me. I donít feel right. If i was thinking in Islamic terms, i should marry her without hesitation. But i feel its more difficult then that. She's willing and i have so much respect for her endurance and courage. She's been through thick and thin. I lost 3 precious ****** with her, i have sinned so much. Something Almighty will never forgive for. But Allah(swt) says he is the forever forgiving, and i always pray for the day she will be mine, where we both share everything together, in peace. Inshallah.
//////////////// [BengalTiger ] ////////////////
http://www.Banglachat.net |
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Darcy
New Member
United Kingdom
70 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 22:17:00
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BengiTiger heh that brought a tear to my eyes :S i wish u both the best of luck in life ..
+KaT+
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admin
Forum Admin
United Kingdom
1541 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 22:32:04
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Thats sweet bengaltiger, hope it all works out for u bro, keep at it, dont give up! there are a lot more tough times to face, you will go thru so many more difficulties, stay strong and don't let anyone come between your love.
"98% of the time i'm right, why worry about the other 3%?" |
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ShazJustShaz
New Member
United Kingdom
96 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 22:46:30
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aawwwwwwww.............. dats soooo sweet Bengal Tiger
GOOD LUCK!!!!
Insha Allah everything will work out for u!!!!! |
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ShazJustShaz
New Member
United Kingdom
96 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 22:53:24
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quote:
but the worst part is he now lives over the road from me with his wife :SSS
i'm not in love with him anymore .. but as my 1st love he will always have a soft spot in my heart :)
So sorry to hear dat Darcy...must be hard!
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Darcy
New Member
United Kingdom
70 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 23:00:19
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it's hard when i'm haveing a bad day !! and he does'nt stop arrassing me even tho he's married!
+KaT+ |
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ShazJustShaz
New Member
United Kingdom
96 Posts
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Posted - 30 Mar 2004 : 23:36:04
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quote:
it's hard when i'm haveing a bad day !! and he does'nt stop arrassing me even tho he's married!
Ooooooh no!!! DAT MUST BE HORRIBLE!!!
so he hasn't got over u yet!!! that makes it worse!!
i don't understand y parents think they can fix things by getting sum1 married!!!! it usually makes matter's worse!!!! now not only r u n him suffering but his wife's probably experencing problems!
tsk tsk tsk
hope things get better for u!!!!
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BengaLTiger
Moderator
United Kingdom
617 Posts
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Posted - 31 Mar 2004 : 00:44:56
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Come on .. Group hug everyone ..... come ere .. come ere ... Huggyzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ... Love you all ...
//////////////// [BengalTiger ] ////////////////
http://www.Banglachat.net |
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Darcy
New Member
United Kingdom
70 Posts
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Posted - 31 Mar 2004 : 00:49:45
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bengltiger!!!!!!! cho sweet :$$$$$
+KaT+ |
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Mister Relaxed
Junior Member
United Kingdom
155 Posts
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Posted - 15 Apr 2004 : 17:28:28
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| i think background are dependent on lifestyle..let me break it down..anybody can say how much of a "dont care" about background kinda person they are..but how many of us actually look at our life and see who could possibly fit in with that..how many of us would actually look at personal compromise and sacrifice before our potential partners..these are very valid points..Mr X may just be drowned in a sea of love,he may just be seeing Miss Y and all she contains...but theres more than just acceptance here...its a life change...converting is a personal choice..do u even ask?? |
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