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Lutonian
Asian Moderator
United Kingdom
9260 Posts
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Posted - 06 Oct 2004 : 16:44:45
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> >> My parents are from Glasgow which means they're incredibly hard, but
> >> I was never smacked as a child ... well maybe one or two grams to get
> >> me to sleep at night. Susan Murray at the Underbelly
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Is it fair to say that there'd be less litter in Britain if blind
> >> people were given pointed sticks? Adam Bloom at the Pleasance
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> I realised I was dyslexic when I went to a toga party dressed as a
> >> goat. Marcus Brigstocke at the Assembly Rooms
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> My dad's dying wish was to have his family around him. I can't help
> >> thinking he would have been better off with more oxygen. Jimmy Carr
> >> at the ICC
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> You have to remember all the trivia that your girlfriend tells you,
> >> because eventually you get tested. She'll go: "What's my favourite
> >> flower?" And you murmur to yourself: "Sh*t, I wasn't listening ...
> >> Self-raising?" Addy Van-Der-Borgh at the Assembly Rooms
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> The world is a dangerous place; only yesterday I went into Boots and
> >> punched someone in the face. Jeremy Limb, at the Trap
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Cats have nine lives. Which makes them ideal for experimentation.
> >> Jimmy Carr
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> I saw that show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die. I would have thought
> >> the obvious one was "Shout For Help". Mark Watson, Rhod Gilbert at
> >> the Tron
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> I went out with an Irish Catholic. Very frustrating. You can take the
> >> Girl out of Cork ... Markus Birdman at the Pod Deco
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Got a phone call today to do a gig at a fire station. Went along.
> >> Turned out it was a bloody hoax. Adrian Poynton at the Pleasance
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a
> >> winner and a loser at the same time. Demetri Martin at the Assembly
> >> Rooms
> >>
> >> The right to bear arms is slightly less ludicrous than the right to
> >> arm bears. Chris Addison at the Pleasance
> >>
> >> My dad is Irish and my mum is Iranian, which meant that we spent most
> >> of our family holidays in Customs. Patrick Monahan at the Gilded
> >> Balloon
> >>
> >> A dog goes into a hardware store and says: "I'd like a job please".
> >> The hardware store owner says: "We don't hire dogs, why don't you go
> >> join the circus?" The dog replies: "What would the circus want with
> >> a plumber". Steven Alan Green at C34
> >>
> >> Hey - you want to feel really handsome? Go shopping at Asda. Brendon
> >> Burns at the Pleasance
> >>
> >> I like to go into the Body Shop and shout out really loud "I've
> >> already got one!" Norman Lovett at The Stand
> >>
> >> It's easy to distract fat people. It's a piece of cake.
> >> Chris Addison at the Pleasance
> >>
> >> I enjoy using the comedy technique of self-deprecation - but I'm not
> >> very good at it. Arnold Brown at The Stand
> >>
> >> If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a
> >> tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire.
> >> They're trained for that. Milton Jones at the Underbelly
> >>
> >> I was walking the streets of Glasgow the other week and I saw this
> >> sign: "This door is alarmed." I said to myself: "How do you think I
> >> feel?" Arnold Brown at The Stand
Aint nobody...posts it better... |
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sweet_as_suga
Super Duper Asian
United Kingdom
7206 Posts
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Posted - 06 Oct 2004 : 17:46:50
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lolz!!!!!! sum of dese r well gud!
.•:*¨`*:•.mi§§iÑ ù I§ Likè BrèâthiÑ- I jù§t çâÑ't §tôp.•:*´¨*:•. |
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Fabia
Super Duper Asian
United Kingdom
6888 Posts
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Posted - 06 Oct 2004 : 18:05:18
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yeh
"He who kneels before Almighty Allah swt; can stand before anyone!"
"O Allah, let our last days be the best days of our life and our last deeds be the best deeds, and let the best day be the day we meet You."
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Lutonian
Asian Moderator
United Kingdom
9260 Posts
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Posted - 06 Oct 2004 : 20:19:49
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my favourite:
> >> You have to remember all the trivia that your girlfriend tells you,
> >> because eventually you get tested. She'll go: "What's my favourite
> >> flower?" And you murmur to yourself: "Sh*t, I wasn't listening ...
> >> Self-raising?" Addy Van-Der-Borgh at the Assembly Rooms
> >>
Aint nobody...posts it better... |
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Fabia
Super Duper Asian
United Kingdom
6888 Posts
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Posted - 07 Oct 2004 : 07:17:30
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lol bruv
"He who kneels before Almighty Allah swt; can stand before anyone!"
"O Allah, let our last days be the best days of our life and our last deeds be the best deeds, and let the best day be the day we meet You."
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fawaz
Super Duper Asian
United Kingdom
2966 Posts
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Posted - 07 Oct 2004 : 13:09:27
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"generously smilin"........heehee
"aja we tu nachle balle balle" |
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Fabia
Super Duper Asian
United Kingdom
6888 Posts
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Posted - 07 Oct 2004 : 16:16:53
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loil
"He who kneels before Almighty Allah swt; can stand before anyone!"
"O Allah, let our last days be the best days of our life and our last deeds be the best deeds, and let the best day be the day we meet You."
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Amina
Super Duper Asian
United Kingdom
9601 Posts
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Posted - 07 Oct 2004 : 23:15:46
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lolz
live life 2 d ful xtent |
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